Family ‘staggered’ by kindness shown in support of mum’s bucket list
Kind donations and fundraising have helped a family from Shoreham share some precious bucket list adventures together.
Debby Sadler grew up in Shoreham and brought up her two children, Dave Mayfield and Lisa Manville, in the town.
The family raised £5,500 through GoFundMe and then Dave, 33, a retained Shoreham firefighter, raised a further £2,000 with the help of the crew in a 10-mile ladder challenge.
Some of the money went to The Fire Fighters Charity but the rest has enabled Debby, 60, to tick things of her wish list, having been told in August she had just a few months to live.
Lisa, 31, who lives in Worthing, said: “She was diagnosed with cancer on July 31 but we had to wait until August 18 for the prognosis. She was told she had three to six months to live. It was horrendous.
“My mum is literally my best friend. She is so incredible. She has always been so supportive, whatever we have done.
“Everyone’s kind donations have helped us organise some really amazing days out for her and tick off a lot on her list.
“We started on September 8 and did four or five in September, then some more this month. There is still a helicopter trip left to do but that is challenging with Covid.
“We are glad we managed to do it sooner rather than later. She is too poorly to do anything now. We have made some really nice memories and she has had a good laugh.”
Debby was told at a hospital appointment last week that her pancreatic cancer has spread to her liver, causing jaundice.
Lisa said: “We are quite surprised how she has deteriorated so quickly. I can’t ever remember mum being ill before. It is heartbreaking.”
Debby’s husband, Kev Sadler, is self-employed but he has given up work to look after her at their home in Hastings.
Adventures With Mum, as Lisa calls it, started after the family was given the prognosis.
Lisa explained: “We said to try to think of some things she wanted to do and she made a wish list, so we have been going through it.
“One of her favourites was indoor sky diving. Just seeing her face was amazing. She absolutely loved it. She is glad she did it early on as any later and her stomach would have been too uncomfortable.”
There has been a spa day with afternoon tea at Alexander House, a trip to the Harry Potter Studio Tour, a visit to The Grand for Debby’s wedding anniversary and an overnight stay at Port Lympne Safari Park, where she fed the monkeys with her grandson, Oli, seven.
Debby, Dave and Lisa also got matching tattoos featuring a heart.
Lisa said: “She always hated tattoos but I messaged her for a joke about getting one and a week later, she said ‘let’s do it’. We all three got one.”
Dave and his partner Charlie Whittaker were due to get married in Santorini in May but it was postponed until October, then cancelled due to the coronavirus restrictions.
Lisa said: “She couldn’t fly, so she had expected she wouldn’t see them get married but Dave and his partner organised a blessing at St Mary’s Church in Shoreham on September 12, a really small, intimate ceremony. She was so excited that she got to wear her wedding outfit.”
Dave and Charlie have since announced they are expecting a baby in April, so they have organised their wedding for October 2021.
Lisa said: “All these things we would never have been able to do without the donations. It is absolutely staggering how kind people have been. We were really hoping to raise £1,000 and we did that in the first two hours. We have made some really nice memories.”
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